Not my day!

House is a mess, kids are not listening, I am yelling, my husband is exhausted, the dog had another accident, and my checkbook is screaming to be balanced.  How did I solve this problem?  I cried!  I cried like a little baby!  I hid in my room and I cried!  My prayers during this bawling mess sounded like this...

Dear Lord, Make this go away.  Help me get my kids to listen.  Why don't they help?  What am I doing wrong?  I am horrible at this, please help me! 

This is not exact, but definitely where my head was!  FIX THIS Lord!  I am going to lay here and cry while you work a miracle for me!  And while you're at it, help me stand up a 30 pound lighter woman with perfect hair and cute clothes!  Thanks!!

Not my day!  That's right!  It isn't my day!  It NEVER should be my day!  It is all about Him! 

I told you about my plan for change!  I did well for a few days and met with God, prayed whole-heartedly, read His word, and gave it all to him!  He used me to witness, help others through prayer, and provided me ample opportunities to talk to my children about His unending faith!  The days were literally filled with Him!  It wasn't my day, it was all for Him and boy did He fill it with glory and blessings!  Even though Justin hit a deer with his truck doing thousands of dollars worth of damage and my son had a severe anxiety attack due to storms, I was calm and God led my words and actions through it all!  Pretty cool!

Yet, I turned my thoughts right back to what I can do to make me happy.  I walked away in my actions.  My desire to love and seek God was there, but the laziness and selfishness sunk in and I was right back to my old habits.  Guess what these days have been like! Ugly, that's what! I have not been satisfied with anything that has come my way.  Grumbling, annoyed, angry, afraid, and self-centered are words that just scratch the surface of my ugly plan for the past few days. 

Why do we stray?  Why do I want these days to be all about me and not my heavenly Father who has provided in so much and thinks and loves me every minute?  I don't have the answer except that I stumble.  Have you seen this new American Ninja Warrior show?  My mom introduced me to it this weekend and it is unbelievable if you haven't seen it.  My life is just like what these guys are doing, except definitely not literally!  Each day I can start prepared and ready or I can jump in and hope for the best.  Luckily our great God gives us 2nd and 3rd and 4th..etc. chances to get to the end of the day!  He is there pushing us, guiding, watching, and letting us struggle sometimes!  However, when I turn it to him BEFORE the race of the day starts, those obstacles shrink and I know with His help I will get to the end!

So, tomorrow is another day!  It will not be my day, it will be all for Him!  I trust that you will turn each day to him, whether you fell yesterday or not, in order to glorify Him!